Saturday, 8 September 2012

Shopping Days to Christmas.

It's never too late or early to start shopping for Christmas. No need to fight the crowds in the shops. At a time when you want to secure a number of early Easter egg discounts. Forget about the summer holiday adverts on TV just after the queen has given the nation another pep talk. 

You could and should make a gradual start now!

Click Here to find the number of days until Christmas.

So the RoA blog brings you a few ideas to fill your boots and socks during the  fun filled festivities.

Robert Herring has patented an adults' version of the children's chocolate "Advent calendar." It has 25 doors for each day leading up to Christmas. When opened, each door reveals a different condom, with different colours, flavours and styles for each day in December. Behind each door there is a picture of a new sexual position to try for the day. On Christmas Eve a Santa Claus condom is presented. This is red with a white rim and a white bobble on top. 

The RoA blog is going to patent an Advent calendar for the wrinkly crinklies with just two doors. One door for Christmas and the other for a birthday of your choice!

The RoA Blog brings you the Hair Brush for the follicular challenged man in your life. The perfect gift for that man who may be thinning a bit on top of the old noggin. 
You can remind them that some women find bald men sexy. So that they have some encouragement and hope still going for them. 

With bald man's hair brush. in their hands, slap heads everywhere now have something else to do in the morning when they wake up along with the traditional scratch.

For the man or woman film buff who has everything including the the Psycho Blood Bath shower curtain, The Psycho  Blood Bath bath mat and the Psycho  Blood Bath hand towel. You just need the finishing touch - The Psycho Blood Bath shower gel! 

Bathe yourself in true horror movie style with this bag of bloody shower gel. Have some fun re-creating the famous Hitchcock Psycho  Blood Bath shower scene. with this 400ml IV drip-style bag of Shower Gel.

Flick through the channels as if by magic with the amazing Wand Remote Control! Harry Potter fans will be shouting "Imperio" at their televisions with gusto thanks to this awesome TV Remote! This is like no other TV Remote. You may start off as clumsily as Ron Weasley, but you'll be as good as Hermione Granger in no time! 

Kymera Wand Remote Control

Leave the younger members of your family and friends scratching their heads as you glide through the TV channels with the Magic Wand Remote Control from Kymera. It works with all televisions and that's not all – it even functions with other  infra-red devices. Magical gestures include rotating anti-clockwise and clockwise, to alter the volume level. Flicking up and down to change channel.

Leading a nomadic boating lifestyle and constant cruising requires the very latest state of the art equipment in toothbrush technology. Twist-n-Brush is a version of Shake-n-Vac but this time for your orifice. 

This is a toothbrush that incorporates a toothpaste dispenser in the handle. This is the ideal device for anyone single handing a boat. With one hand on the tiller and a ligh squeeze on the grip to push the paste into the bristles before brushing. You can clean your teeth on the move.

After all those years spent together and the Memsahib still gets upset if I use her toothbrush! 

So if anyone knows another way of getting dog muck out of my trainers .. I'm all ears!

Now you can make a social statement or comment any time, anywhere with this cool gadget watchThe Universal Bullshit Detector Watch™ It flashes, it moos, it poops… it also tells time!

When asked, "What’s that sound?" Just say, "Oh, sorry, that’s my bullshit detector." This product is non-partisan and non-sectarian. In any language it sounds the same.

Use of this Universal Bullshit Detector Watch™ could get you in deep, err… trouble. It might irritate, frustrate, aggravate, insult and/or piss off whomever you are with. Therefore we must issue the following disclaimer and warning:

We are not responsible for the results of your use of the Universal Bullshit Detector Watch™ whether due to your courage or lack of good judgment. Use of the Universal Bullshit Detector Watch™ may seem endlessly warranted. However, relationships may be adversely and possibly permanently affected. Also, the Universal Bullshit Detector Watch™ is not waterproof, so don't get thrown overboard before taking it off. You will probably find unlimited opportunities to use the Universal Bullshit Detector Watch™ and the batteries are replaceable.

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