A boater walks into a canal side pub and the landlord says, "Hey Bill, I haven't seen you in a quite a while. Whatever happened, you look absolutely terrible!" "What do you mean?"Bill replies, "I'm feeling fine." The landlord pointing a bills leg says, "But what about that wooden leg. You didn't have that before."
"Well," says bill "there was a fight with a Constant Cruiser over a 48 hour mooring. We were in a real battle and a cast iron windlass hit my leg. But the hospital surgeon fixed me up, and I'm fine, really." "Yeah," says the landlord, "But what about that hook? Last time I saw you, you had both hands." "Well," says Bill, "I was in another battle with a Constant Moor'er and we boarded his boat. It was a real hand to hand fight and my hand was cut off with a Chainsaw. But the surgeon fixed me up with this hook, and I feel great, really."
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