The Snooty Toff Prime Minister, Dave Cameron and his chauffeur are driving back to his country retreat at Chequers late one night. Whilst scooting along a country road the PM's car hits a pig, that has wandered onto the road. The pig is killed instantly. The Prime Minister instructs his driver, "Go up to the farm driver, explain to the plebs the circumstances of what has just happened. Fob them off with some sort of story and hurry back here."
An hour later, Dave Cameron sees his driver staggering back from the farm, his clothes are all wrinkled, bright red lipstick is smeared on his face, a half drunk bottle of the finest whiskey in one hand and a top of the range Cuban cigar in the other.
An hour later, Dave Cameron sees his driver staggering back from the farm, his clothes are all wrinkled, bright red lipstick is smeared on his face, a half drunk bottle of the finest whiskey in one hand and a top of the range Cuban cigar in the other.
"Where have you been all this time driver?" asks the Prime Minister.
The driver replied "Well, Prime Minister, the farmer gave me a bottle of whiskey, his wife gave me a Cuban cigar, and their very attractive 19-year-old daughter made wild passionate love to me."
The prime minister enquired "What exactly did you tell them had happened?" The driver answers, I said "Good evening, I am the Prime Minister David Cameron's chauffeur and I have just killed the pig."
Later.....
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