ASBO



As the government phases out the use of the ASBO and replaces them by use of the CrimBO (Criminal Behaviour Orders) it was felt that such an award as the ASBO could not be allowed to fall into disuse. The ASBO is now a special award given to a select few Anti-Social Boat Owners.





If you have been directed to this page it is because another boat owner considers that you are worthy of the award of Anti-Social Boat Owner of the week. To qualify for such and award, you have to demonstrate a complete lack of consideration to other boat users - In one or more of the following categories.

Demonstrating qualities like:-

  1.     Running your petrol generator late into the evening.
  2.     Running your engine late into the evening.
  3.     Overstaying on the more popular visitor moorings.
  4.     Playing loud music at any-time.
  5.     Mooring on a water-point when not taking on water.
  6.     Mooring on a lock landing when not transiting the lock.
  7.     Mooring in a way that limits available space for other boat users.
  8.     Reserving a mooring space for someone else.
  9.     Mooring on a visitor mooring that has a power point and then not using it.
  10.     Mooring in close proximity to a tight bend.
  11.     Mooring in close proximity to a Bridge hole.
  12.     Mooring in close proximity to a winding hole.
  13.     Moving at a speed that causes excessive movement to moored boats.
  14.     Moving at a speed that causes a breaking wash.
  15.     Turning an empty lock against oncoming boats.
  16.     Refusing to share a lock with your shiny new boat.

Males: I fully understand why you are embarrassed by your situation. This does not however release you from any responsibility of behaving in an acceptable way. Whilst I have some sympathy for your small todger, you can't make up for the loss by trying to be a complete knob head. Take a day off.

Female: I understand why you are embarrassed by your situation. The size of your bottom is legendary on the Inland Waterways. Whilst I have some sympathy for your huge arse. This does not however allow you to be a complete arsehole at all times. Take a day off.


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