Wednesday, 7 December 2011

Speaker gets his own Coat of Arms

There is not much happening along the cut at the moment, so there is little to comment upon. However, in this time of austerity its nice to know that John Bercow the speaker of the house has created his own coat of arms to go along with his new portrait by Brendan Kelly which has cost the taxpayer a mere snip of £37,000.

John Bercow took inspiration from his predecessor "Gorbals Mick" AKA Baron Martin of Springburn. Bercow enjoyed a simple upbringing, giving a nod to the position he now holds in parliament by placing a ladder at the centre of the design.

There is a conscious jocular emphasis on equality in the motto swathed along the bottom saying "All are equal". I think this may have something to do with porcine avionics.

The theme is echoed with the inclusion of the pink triangles and rainbow colours that refer to gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender rights which the Speaker champions. The reason for the golden balls are a nod to his love of tennis.

Bercow chose a red and blue background, a reference to the main political parties. Ignoring the Lib dems and the greens.  Two scimitars are borrowed from the coat of arms of Essex University where he studied macrame.

Meanwhile back in the playpen of government - Health Minister Simon Burns, who in a moment of clarity, referred to Speaker Bercow as a “sanctimonious dwarf”. In retaliation, Berko's  wife the ever popular Sally Bercow - who was thrown out of the house by Big Brother. Called PM David Cameron a “twat” and an “arrogant toff” referred to Chancellor George Osborne as ‘mental’ and said she felt "repelled" by Boris Johnson. There is much to commend the observational turn of phrase of the fragrant Sally. Who is currently on the short list as a prospective Labour MP. You just can't make it up!

The painting of the Speaker has been added to the Parliamentary Art Collection. The painting will be hung in the Speaker's residence where very few people will be able to see it. The tax payer public would like the same to happen to Berko!


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