£100,000 how to wash your hands video!

The board of British Waterways comes in for some well justified criticism from time to time about their various financial cock-ups. Its a hard earned accolade that has been bestowed upon the incumbent screw-ups of Ivory Towers. However, BWB are not alone and there are several others hot on their heels who can run them in a close second place.

FFFF Award

You need to be very special in the realm of cock-ups to be able to make a challenge against British Waterways. After all its what they do best. Loss making ventures like Pubs have earned the BW top management a nomination in the "Flying Fickle Finger of Fate" award. (Gold Standard)

Like "Call me Dave" Cameron and his Farcical, Fraught, Feeble and Fatuous attempt at a "trendy" YouTube video. (Silver Standard)

West Sussex County Council  has been criticised after spending £100,000 pounds making videos on subjects such as 'how to wash your hands' and 'how to make a phone call.' 

The videos uploaded on to YouTube also advise local people on how to read maps and the essential user guide to using a compass. Another movie features Buckingham Palace-style Christmas greeting (the Council and I)  from its  Tory Council Leaders.

Recently the council revealed it has spent just over £100,000 pounds making YouTube videos since setting up the film unit five years ago.The figure has against all expectations angered residents who have seen big cuts in other services, like day care for the elderly, bus routes and library opening hours. The cash-strapped local authority is seeking to make £79,000,000 pounds worth of savings on its 1bn pounds a year budget over the next three years.

Lib Dem Councillor James Walsh claimed only a few hundred people out of the county's 750,000 population had bothered looking at the video's. He said: "That doesn't seem like good value to me. It's a kick in the teeth for all those elderly and younger adults who have had their care packages reduced or stopped, in the name of saving cash for the county. Can the Tory leadership really believe that a YouTube film unit is a higher priority than providing care packages for the frail elderly or residents with a learning disability? This luxury enterprise seems yet another step too far, and demonstrating how far the Tory county council is divorced from reality."

In the film titled 'How To Use a Mobile Phone' the presenter explains: "I have my phone firmly in my right hand and then select the digit of choice, in my case the left index finger. Place your finger on the button - don't come at it from a distance." Another essential video for tax payers, called How To Wash Your Hands Effectively, tells viewers to "wet your hands before you apply the soap" and "work up a lather and dry with a clean hand towel."

Some of the other eyecatching videos on the councils YouTube Channel have had as many as 350 hits in 5 years. The council admits it spent £40,000 pounds on a the camera and editing equipment. The film unit's annual running costs are £26,000 pounds, which includes a part-time person who films, edits and maintains the equipment. The part time person, also cleans the council leaders bespoke toilet and makes the tea, But only after watching the how to wash your hands video.

Digging a deeper hole in their ozone like credibility. Council leader Louise Goldsmith said: "The Conservative run county council realises how important it is to keep residents informed particularly at a time when it is faced with the challenge of finding 79m pounds. The YouTube film clips are a good way of keeping our residents informed in all sorts of important areas, such as Age with Confidence. Pictures are worth a thousand words, and the council has always been firmly committed to finding new ways of reaching out to, and communicating with, the residents we serve."

The movies were dismissed by the Taxpayers' Alliance, which said "No-one wanted to watch the films. Some councils either have more money and time than they know what to do with, or have a misguided understanding of what their job involves. Publicity and communications has long been an area where some councils simply don't seem to understand what is a good idea and what isn't. More worryingly, some of them don't seem either able or willing to learn from their mistakes and stop pursuing poor ideas when they have clearly failed."

Flying Fickle Finger of Fate Award - Called the Rigid Digit, the Winged Weenie, Wonderful Wiggler, Friendly Phalange or the Nifty Knuckle, was presented for the dumbest or craziest news item of the week. Available in Gold, Silver or Bronze, the award is a "hand" mounted on a trophy base. Its index finger adorned with two small wings.

Later...