Monday, 9 November 2015

Idiot on board

There you are, on a very tranquil bit of the canal. The weather is surprisingly warm if a bit blustery for the time of year. Then you can hear it in the distance tonk, tonk, tonk. Its not an unpleasant sound when heard from a distance. But as it gets closer the sound becomes much louder and the the tonking is now a peace shattering, irregular crack, crack, crack.

Into view comes the boat complete with a moron stood at the tiller. Dressed in the obligatory faux leatherette waistcoat, sporting a jaunty neckerchief and a slightly too large hat perched just above the eyes.  The chinless wonder seemingly oblivious to his surroundings and the racket he is creating.

Then I spotted that the chinless, knuckle dragging twonk is sporting a pair of industrial ear defenders. WTF is that all about. Who in their right mind would be operating a boat with not an iota of silencing.  Creating mayhem for boaters moored up all around their line of progress. Boating in a world of deafening noise to the point that they feel the need to wear ear defenders.
Maybe its time that noise levels should form part of the BSC examination.

I'm searching for a descriptive collective noun to describe such idiots.

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